SO WE DIDN’T GET into the Eurovision final. So what! We can get gay married and drown our Eurovision sorrows with a good old drinking game.
All you’ll need is a telly, some pals (or Twitter pals) and a beverage of your choice – wine, beer, tea, whatever suits.
Take one sip of your drink every time each of the following happens…
1. The backing dancers upstage the singers
Every time a dancer conspicuously crawls across the floor, or twirls around uselessly, take a drink. (This happens more often than you’d expect.)
2. A contestant wears a cape
Didn’t you hear? Capes are big news at Eurovision this year.
Drink every time you see one, and pray someone doesn’t do a Madonna (or pray someone does, if you’re into that sort of thing).
3. You hear a strange, nonsensical lyric
Like this one, from Belgium (above): “We’re gonnara-ba-bab, ra-ba-bab/ We’re gonnara-ba-bab tonight”. You can have that one for free.
4. The hosts try to joke around, but fail miserably
Inevitable. DRINK!
5. Graham Norton makes a sassy comment
Norton loves his zingers. Enough to get you stinking drunk? We’ll see.
6. Marty Whelan seems bemused by the whole thing
Drink every time he says something sort of vague, like this:
7. Someone snarks about Australia being in the competition
This is the Eurovision. Snarking is not allowed (much). DRINK.
8. The Irish representative appears on screen
Look! IT’S US! IT’S US! Waaaheeyy!
9. Someone does something truly weird
It’s looking rare at this year’s competition, but if it happens, it MUST be commemorated.
10. Someone says ‘douze pointe’
You might as well go for broke at this stage. DOUZE POINTE FOR ALL!
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